A few months back, I went on a date with D. We’d met on one of those dating sites I subscribe to. The conversation flowed well. There was none of that awkward what do I say next moments. 

It wasn’t long before he’d ask me out. He told me to leave all the plans to him. So I did. We met for coffee and chatted while sharing photos of our children.  It was going so well. As we drained our cardboard cups full of Soy Chai Latte, we decided we didn’t want it to end. So I said, “What’s next?”

He didn’t have a suggestion so I suggested we hop in my car and sit at the marina and watch The City across the bay. He agreed.

The conversation continued and we begin making out it my backseat like two teenagers with nowhere else to go.

I left feeling enchanted and eager to share my favorite things with him, especially a Islanders hockey game. We’d even planned to have Italian for dinner the next time we went out.

With hope in my heart for the first time in a long time, I checked in with him daily. The conversation begun sounding friendly but formal. My friend tried to comfort me. Saying I was probably expecting too much.  But my head told me something was up.

I waited for him to get home from his daily evening Starbucks run to send him a quick text to ask him how he was. His response, “Good Bella. How is your night at work?”

Yea, you guessed it, I don’t work at night.  My response, “If you mean mommy duty, it’s going fine. ”

That was it, never another text.

Here’s the thing gentleman, the media would have you believe women are so fragile you can’t just say “I am just not into you”.  I have no problem with these words and I am not going to ask you to come back. Because in fact, I don’t want be your second thought choice.

So pull up your big girl panties and tell us. Stop worrying about our reaction because not being straight hurts worse.

Oh, and if you say you’re going to plan a date, actually have a plan.