It was a typical Saturday morning. I was running with O to Target to buy yet another birthday present for one of her friends. Target is my shop of choice for birthday gifts.
Walking into the store, I saw him and his smile met mine. It’s unusual for me to even notice anyone in a store but he was different. He was tall, dark and handsome. I mean strikingly so. I glanced down at O and realized I had no time to fantasize about this guy. So, we headed for the toy aisle. Picked out an appropriate toy for her friend and headed for the checkout. I gathered our purchases. O and I walked toward the exit hand in hand.
As I turned to look at her beautiful face, I saw him out of the corner of my eye. I thought nothing of it. But I could swear he was smiling at me again. I didn’t mind. It made me feel confident that someone I found attractive seemed to be attracted to me.
As I loaded O and our purchases in the car, he drove by. As I rounded the car to get in the drivers seat, he backed up. His car was as good looking as he was. He stopped behind may car and said, “Excuse me, but I think I know you.”
“Maybe,” I said.
This wasn’t my usual abrasive response. Guess I wanted to know if we knew each other even though I felt it was highly unlikely.
So he asked where I worked. No connection. He asked my name. No connection. I asked his and when he told me a light went off.
“We met at the Mexican place downtown.” I said
“Yes, that’s it. You were with your mom. I gave you my card. You never called.” He said.
“No, but are you still personal training?” I asked.
He told me no but explained he was in his last year running track professionally. I was infatuated instantly.
He broke my thought with, “You got you number for me yet.”
I did in fact give him my number and felt elated doing so. I am not used to that kind of attention anymore. And he was just “everything” in my head.
We spent the next two days furiously texting about everything we could think of and decided to meet up again Monday.
Monday came and for some reason I shared his photo with my co-worker. Something I never do. Her reaction was priceless.
“I know him. He’s my sons best friend. And he’s married and she’s amazing.”
My illusions were immediately shattered. He was no longer “everything”. He became every man I’d ever known. He was a liar and a cheat. And this time the disappointment hurt. I was into everything about him. All of it felt so real.
Sounds silly that I was so hurt, but I was. He convinced me to meet him anyway that Monday. He said he wasn’t married but peacefully co-parenting with his ex. I guess it was curiosity to figure out who he was. Give him the benefit of the doubt. But that was what I shouldn’t have done. He further destroyed the illusion by making me realize he was just interested in what was in my pants and not creating some kind of relationship. The result is loss of my faith in serendipity.
I have a rather short sating history, yet I have dayed married men twice! Neither told me he was attached, but rather I found out one way or another.
Why do they think this is ok? We get strung along emotionally, when in fact he is leading a life with his wife and children. We get hurt and then return to our single lives. So disappointing!
I also worry about if i ever get married, will my future husband ever do that?? There would be hell to pay if I ever found out!